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Why does the man I love look at porn?

“What you need to know”

It’s one of the more common reasons that wives come in for counseling – “My husband is looking at porn,” she says, devastated. “Why am I not good enough for him?” She wonders if she should leave him or if she should stay and try to work it out.
Sadly, 56% of divorce cases involve one party having an obsessive interest in online porn, but she doesn’t want to become another statistic. The good news is that a great majority of marriages I work with that involve sex addiction end up better than before the discovery.
It can be helpful to start by looking at why men look at porn. Here are a few of the reasons that men use porn:

  • They like the excitement that porn offers, and the “high” they get when watching it.
  • They are using porn to mask hidden issues, such as loneliness, fear, or feelings of low self-worth.
  • They consider looking at pornography as normal behavior after regularly seeing it growing up. Plus, they figure, ‘all men do this.’
  • They enjoy the feeling of being in control without an emotional attachment.
  • The women they are watching may perform sexual practices without hesitation, without getting tired, and they are always ready for more.
  • It is an escape from everyday life that the man rationalizes as an emotional release.

Though is helps to understand better why men look at porn, it does not always diminish the hurt that a wife experiences when she realizes that her husband has participated in the activity.
According to the Journal of Adolescent Health, prolonged exposure to pornography leads to:

  • Diminished trust between intimate couples
  • The abandonment of hope of sexual monogamy
  • Belief that marriage is sexually confining
  • Lack of attraction to family and child-raising

Pornography is a serious issue that can be addictive. Both the man and woman can benefit from counseling in this situation, in order to re-connect and address the feelings caused by this behavior. Understanding the behavior is the first step towards getting help. Take the next step and contact us today.

2 comments

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    Comment by オンラインカジノ 2ch on November 7, 2012 at 5:59 am

  2. i needed that, an additional wonderful read.
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    Comment by オンラインカジノ 詐欺 on November 8, 2012 at 3:42 pm

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